20 Disasters That Are Guaranteed To Strike Any Girl DOWN!

20 Disasters That Are Guaranteed To Strike Any Girl DOWN!

20 Disasters That Are Guaranteed To Strike Any Girl DOWN!

Come on ladies, being a girl is HARD, right!? & Don’t get me wrong, I’m not one sided, I know men have their issues as well, I know that first hand, but at the end of the day, I’m a girl and I can only talk from a girl’s perspective….

AND THAT SHIT IS DIFFICULT, MAN.

Honestly, we have baby-making equipment and sh*tty hormones that just invade our systems and make our lives a living hell on a daily basis, so most of the time, we’re never in our right minds anyway!

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Just think about that for a second…

& Then think how cr*ppy life is in general…depression, anxiety, existential crisis’, house prices, grief, careers, diets, dating, kids…family…friends…TINDER!!! Arrrrrghhhh! How are we meant to do it?

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& Even worse than all that ‘big stuff’, we have the little things…the little things are the ones that make or break women, we can handle all that big stuff like troopers, but if we burn our toast or step on the cat’s tail, we’ve had it…breakdown initiated!!

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So, just to brighten up your day a little (or not, as the case may be!) we’ve compiled a list of 20 of these ‘little breakdown initiators’ to give you a relatable chuckle…or a breakdown, we’ll see how it goes!

Enjoy, ladies!

1. The coffee cup vandal that is lipstick


This is one of the main reasons why I don’t wear lipstick….well, apart from the fact that it makes me look like a 31-year-old Grandma (and I’ve tried every shade going, believe me!) Some women may not like it as they see it as a waste of lipstick, but to me, it’s just yuk! It’s even worse if you’re drinking from a cup or glass!

2. Mismatch makeup hell


When you’ve accidentally put on way too much makeup…or the wrong shade of concealer and the colour of your face doesn’t match your neck AND you’re late for work and have no time to fix it! Cr*p!

3. Quality, not quantity!


The Holy Grail of makeup products above, is probably what guy’s think a $100 of makeup looks like!

Whereas the reality is very different:


We’d probably only get an eyeshadow palette and one lipstick for that! It’s crazy, we need to sell our souls to be able to afford any of it these days!

4. When cookies have a better highlighter game than you…


Seriously, what they using!? They look so beautiful. & Here’s me, I can’t even put my eyeliner on right without looking like an alcoholic panda!

5. Thin hair is the devil


Seriously, having thin wispy, damaged baby hair has been the bane of my life! I cry about it at least once a day! You just can’t DO ANYTHING WITH IT!!

6. R.I.P to all those poor brushes…


Every time we buy a new brush, we make a sworn promise to it that we will look after it and keep it clean…and we never do. Sorry, brush brethren, we’re just lazy!

7. NEVER cry after a spray tan…


Oh, you already did…that’s sh*t, girl! Hope the tears were worth it! Sometimes there’s just no holding them in!

8. Guys have better everything!


They never seem to have shit hair or skin either, what gives guys!?

9. Do you want to know why women are always late?


There’s your answer…I must go through about 10,000 pairs of tights in a month! Gah!

10. How do you know when you need your nails done?


When this sh*t starts happening, that’s when!

11. When you ask your friends to get cute pictures of you whilst on holiday


*sigh* Expectations never match reality, do they!?

12. Sometimes, it’s the only way


Especially when it’s murdering your scalp…sometimes, losing a small amount of hair is the only sacrifice.

13. The worst mistake…


Getting that satisfying feeling from rubbing your burning fiery, itchy as hell eyeball and then looking at your hand and realising that you’ve smudged your makeup! B*lls! Utter b*lls!

14. Women and Rattlesnakes Unite!


Distance and respect, that sounds great to me. That’s all women want too! I’m off to join the Rattlesnake society!

15. When you decide to throw caution to the wind and carry your compact powder in your handbag…


Yeah, never ends well, does it!? & It’s always the one we’ve paid $70 for!

16. Although there is something worse than powder related handbag disaster…


& That’s handbag glass bottle concealer/foundation disaster! Why god, why!?

17. When all you wanted was to have some hair ties with you…


and you got the risk of cutting off your blood circulation and possible slow amputation!

18. Why do we bother with these things!?


They’re not comfortable at all and they always decide to break/snap at the worst possible moment! Showing off our pedicure and getting tan lined feet just isn’t worth that sh*t!

19. Bun disaster


This may be a bit of a disaster, but who else thinks this could pass as some kind of abstract art!? I totally think it could!

20. & Finally, trying to get a scenic, Instagram worthy pic just doesn’t happen for us normal folk….we have to contend with this…


Just doesn’t have the right impact does it?

Ah well, nevermind ladies, we may be crazy and emotional unstable sometimes…but 90% of the time, we’re still killing it!

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