Let’s not forget the week before a period when you are PMS-ing, so basically, we pretty much spend half of every month dealing with this stuff and being mad at people. And when it comes to having to use contraptions such as pads and... tampons... well, that's a whole other kettle of fish entirely.
There really is nothing scarier than second-guessing yourself when it comes to the removal of an old tampon. Did I take it out? If not where is it now? How will I ever reach it again? How do I even check? Truly terrifying.
And here we have the second next terrifying thing about tampons... when you forget to even freakin' change them. Not only is it SUPER gross but, the thought of having to eventually pull it out is enough to make a grown woman weep.
Here's a shout out to one of the greatest (perhaps, the only greatest) things about tampons. It's the fact that they seem to evoke pure TERROR in every single man that exists on this planet. Yep, even unused ones. What the heck are they SO afraid of?
If nobody has copyrighted this already then I freakin' will!
One of the biggest rules of the unspoken girl code: when it comes to tampons, no woman gets left behind! We're all in this big ole mess together ladies, after all!
This honestly gets me every time. I mean men truly have absolutely no clue, do they? Even the freakin' ROCKET SCIENTISTS can't figure our periods out. ROCKET SCIENTISTS!
By this time next year, I wouldn't be surprised if tampons really were $80 a pop in all honesty. Gotta love that luxurious item tax!
Okay well, I just discovered the second most useful thing about tampons, this is genius!
Honestly, this is basically better than the original Twilight. Remember that phase everyone went through of being obsessed with this garbage? Dark, dark times.
It's true - sometimes I carry around tampons even when I'm 100% certain I won't need them because you just never know when you may run into a fellow female who does. Sharing is caring, after all!
Being on your period is pretty much like having a free pass though, isn't it? Feel like being rude as hell? Feel like getting blackout drunk on a Tuesday afternoon? Feel like eating the entire McDonald's menu in 30 minutes? It's all good sis - you're on your period!
And of course, how can we forget the complete and utter BS of the people inside the TV who feel the need to censor the color of "blood" during period commercials.
Really? Nobody knows what color blood is? Nobody??? If they saw blood on TV would it really do that much freakin' damage??
I have absolutely no idea who started the lie that when women are on their period they like to do crazy active things such as going mountain climbing and wrestling alligators but the fabrication needs to STOP. IMMEDIATELY.
100% incredibly effective defense mechanism when it comes to avoiding unwanted attention from the male population. And let's be real here for a second ladies, isn't it all pretty much unwanted!?
The WORST. Even more so, it feels as though it all happens in slow motion and you know that there is absolutely nothing you can do to stop it.
I can't decide whether this is actually a legitimate product or not.
What I DO know, however, is that I am an absolute fool for not referring to my "monthly curse" as Moonsickness throughout my entire life. A FOOL.