Husbands, where would we be without husbands? Well, we probably wouldn’t drink as much wine during the week and we definitely wouldn’t be turning grey as quickly as we are but… we still love them no matter what.
Also, sometimes it can be hard for us to appreciate just how much of an art form being a husband can actually be. Yes, okay, we complain that they clean things the wrong way or they buy the wrong groceries or don’t put glasses back in the right cupboard or that they clean the kitchen with our make-up sponges – anyway, I could 100% go on.
But no matter how much they grind our gears with this there is one thing we absolutely cannot deny, and that’s the fact that our lives are 100% more interesting with them around.
So this one is for all those husbands out there who really do try their best… even if their best falls about 80% short of the mark most of the time.
1. “My wife said it couldn’t be done.”
Er… are you sure she said it couldn’t be done and not that it shouldn’t be done!? This is like the scariest game of Jenga I have ever seen.
2. A completely valid reason to ask for a divorce in my opinion.
This is right up there with putting tomatoes on my burger and buying me orange juice with pulp in it. IMMEDIATE grounds for divorce… bringing that garbage into my house. Boy BYE!
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3. “I thought my husband brought something dangerous on vacation. Nope. He brought his skincare.”
Good grief… this is actually a man after my own heart. Or is it just me who gets turned on by a man with a vigorous skincare routine? Anybody?
4. “My husband picked up some birthday balloons for our son’s birthday today… He’s turning 8.”
5. He will love you despite all your inconsistencies.
I don’t believe this happened at all. His wife only took 5 minutes to put on her make-up? Yeah, I don’t think so pal… pull the other one!
But also I’m sorry your wife decided to take a selfie without you. Sometimes you just don’t make the cut.
6. “I asked my husband to buy some hair clips for me! This is what I got! No complaints here!”
Congratulations, your husband officially bought you the COOLEST hairclips on the planet. I absolutely adore a good ole’ clamp! Some husband points have definitely been won here.
7. “My husband’s lost car keys have been found, exactly where he left them.”
8. This husband has his priorities in order by the looks of things.
If you own a dog and you’re about to leave them in the house on their own and you don’t set the radio on their favorite station or put the TV on their favorite channel then you are a MONSTER. That is all.
9. “My husband asked how I wanted my pizza cut: triangles or squares? So I replied, ‘circles,’ and this is what I got.”
Well… I mean… he did er… kinda… do what she asked him, right!? I’ve always said that pizza tastes better as a circle anyway.
10. “My wife asked me to dry the dishes.”
11. Maybe he thought the kitty litter could do with a little jazzing up?
Poos… granules… sparkles… oh my! Who knows, maybe the kitty enjoyed the feeling of being a little fabulous for a while!?
12. “Tonight my husband bit into one of my makeup sponges thinking it was a sweet after I told him it wasn’t. But he didn’t believe me.”
This is hilarious. Not so much the fact the husband thought the sponges were sweets in the first place, but that he was so suspicious of his wife’s motives for telling him that they aren’t that he just had to bite into one himself. Now if that action doesn’t scream MAN then I don’t know what does.
13. When your wife asks you to clean the toilet:
14. You’ll never feel bored with this husband.
Well, honestly doll if you don’t want to be married to him anymore I’ll more than happily take over, because he sounds like a RIOT.
15. “Wife asked me to buy Ajax, what do I do?”
Just buy it all man, just buy it all. Better safe than freakin’ sorry after all, am I right?
Then again… let’s be honest… no matter which one you brought home, it’d probably still be the wrong one.
16. When your husband isn’t sure whether his socks belong to the white or to the black basket:
17. “This is how my husband likes to put things in the fridge.”
Honestly, it’s like they’re all part of the same Whatsapp group where they all just put their heads together to come up with new, ingenious ways to infuriate us all for a laugh.
18. Even a strong man has to be taken care of.
Just like teenagers, men only want you to do things for them when they need you to do things for them… which is literally all the freakin’ time.
19. “Every morning our bed looks like this.”
Yeah yeah, show me a married person’s bed that doesn’t look like this… Hey, as long as they don’t dare try to reach over to YOUR side it’s all good though right!?