...Unless of course you managed to do all that and you are ecstatically happy and content with your life choices right now, that is. Congrats to you Queen!
For the rest of us, however, it is just not that simple. Of course, we all have the good intentions to at least attempt to follow that path, but you know what they say about good intentions, right? The road to Hell is utterly paved with them.
And not to mention that for us women, well, everything is just that little bit harder. Because let's face it... life truly is just that little bit harder for us, isn't it!? (Oh boy, I can't wait to see the angry reactions to that statement in the comments later!).
Anyway - as it turns out, there are a number of things we should have "developed" within ourselves by the time we turn the sweet ole' age of 35 - and a "Library of Signs" is apparently one of them. Does this sound like you at all? If so, then writer Anne Thériault totally feels your pain.
Thériault took to Twitter with a list of traits she believes women should have by the age of 35 and it inspired some GREAT responses.
And here is a select few of them...
As you can probably imagine, a lot of women related HARD to this list, so much so in fact that they even offered up their very own additional traits which they, unbeknownst to them, have been carefully and quietly developing over the years.
I mean, when I think about it, I can't actually remember the last time I wiped a counter and it wasn't in an aggressive manner.
I'm not entirely sure when "drinking wine" became my whole personality... it may have been at 25, maybe 30... what I do know, however, is that I am very, very thankful that it freakin' did.
Not to mention, allow me to take this time to give a shout out to all those CVS eye-shadow shimmer palettes I've bought over the years that are lying around collecting dust, still in their original packaging, untouched by human hands.
Sometimes I think about all those times my mother shouted: "MAKE SURE YOU WEAR SOME SUNSCREEN!" every time I went to leave the house and I would respond by shaking my head and rolling my eyes and thinking "Oh mom, what do you know? I know everything. I am INVINCIBLE!" and I get the urge to meet that version of myself so I can shake her until her freakin' head falls off.
I knew NOTHING.
I think this response is probably one of my personal favorites, because I feel every single one of these items deep down in my very SOUL... especially the part about the small fat dog, but in all honesty, I've always known that no man will ever make me feel as good as petting a dog will.
You know what, I don't even mutter it anymore, I just shout it from the top of my lungs no matter where I am or who I'm with. I now know for a FACT that I will not be the only person within the vicinity that feels that way.
To be fair, I've been doing this one for as long as I can remember... It's just now instead of remembering it the minute I leave the room and sit down, I remember it 3 days later when I'm driving to the grocery store.
If I had known that I'd be growing so much hair on the lower part of my face as I got older, I would have made an action plan for running away to the circus and becoming a bearded freakin' lady! At least that would have kept things a little more interesting.
I would 100% buy front-row tickets for Library of Sighs' first-ever world tour.
I LOVE this idea... maybe we can ever get it going as some sort of collaboration between every single woman that has ever existed or will ever exist on the planet ever?
Because I would read that. In fact, I believe that would be the only thing I ever need to read for the rest of my life ever again.