They are the remote control master
Your partner, an undisputed champion of the TV remote, wields it with finesse, and you’ve gracefully surrendered your claim to ever being in charge of it. Even if it is a show that you chose to watch, they will keep the remote next to them, just in case. You find yourself asking them to pause it if you have to get up.
They are the thermostat commander in chief
They’ve assumed the role of the thermostat chief, deciding whether you’ll bask in warmth or shiver in the cold. You have grown accustomed to wearing shorts and a hoody at all times and always keep a blanket close by as predicting what the temperature of the room is going to be is a complete mystery.
They control the shopping list
At the grocery store, your partner orchestrates shopping expeditions like a seasoned general, clutching the shopping list as their battle plan. Meanwhile, you navigate the aisles with the cart, a trusty lieutenant, only an observer of what is getting thrown in there. You are free to make suggestions but these are generally ignored.
Netflix is their domain
In the never-ending battle for Netflix supremacy, your partner reigns supreme as the remote guardian, dictating the evening’s entertainment choices. Your suggestions are heard and considered before you end up watching whatever they wanted to watch in the first place. If you do end up watching your first choice, you weirdly thank them for it.
They know the route before they get in the car
On road trips, they’ve mastered the GPS like a map-reading savant, leaving you to embrace the role of the snack supplier and honorary navigator, even if your directional instincts are correct. The route has been planned without your input, so don’t even try to help. Just be ready to turn the music down when you eventually get lost.
They are the boss of the bed
They’ve staked their claim to the lion’s share of the bed, relegating you to a shrinking island of mattress real estate. You’ve become adept at night-time acrobatics, navigating the bed’s edge to access your side table like a seasoned tightrope walker. Only once they have fallen asleep do you stand a chance of getting even a quarter of the blanket.
They will try to teach you how to load a dishwasher
Loading the dishwasher has become an art form for your partner, complete with strategic placement and meticulous organization. You’re the eager apprentice, learning the sacred rituals of dish arrangement and knowing that the next time you load it, it had better be right. Inevitably, you will be called to come and look at how they have fixed your mistake for you.
They are the DJ of the house
At social gatherings, your partner effortlessly assumes the role of DJ, curating the perfect playlist for any occasion. You’ve gladly handed over the musical reins, content to be the enthusiastic dancer, grooving to their carefully selected tunes with unwavering trust in their annoyingly good musical taste. If a song is requested, you don’t dare do it yourself, leave that up to the DJ.
Takeout is always down to them
Ordering takeout is their kingdom, and even though they say they are happy to order from wherever you want to eat, they don’t mean it. If you want pizza, they’ll want chicken. If you fancy pasta, they might suggest a burger. You play this game every time and you know in the end you’ll just be ordering from the same place you always do.
Your dog is really their dog
Whether the dog joined your home as a couple or it moved in with you, your partner is now in charge of that dog. They have a special bond you can only dream of and don’t really understand. It’s like they communicate telepathically and whenever it’s just you and the dog alone, it’s like you can sense the dog is just waiting for them.
